To compare or not to compare, that is the question…

Eleanor Roosevelt says, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” 

Does any of this sound familiar to you?

• You look at someone’s achievements and all of a sudden you feel like you need to be doing more.
• Your partner is in fabulous shape. You take a look at yourself and instantly feel like flab city.
• You’re in a conversation with colleagues and before you know it, you’re feeling like a mental midget.

If you answered “yes” to any of these (or to something similar), then you’ve been hit with the Comparison Blues.

The Comparison Blues sneak up on you without warning. One minute you’re on top of the world, and the next minute you’re in the pits. You don’t even know what hit you. All you know is you’re now in the dumps, and it feels crummy.

The Comparison Blues is a head space you fall into when you compare yourself to someone else. It’s a place where you feel less than adequate, where you wallow in misery, where you beat yourself up. It’s not a pleasant place to be. Some of us camp out there for an extended stay.

And it blocks us from living success…from the inside out.

Don’t despair. It happens to me, too. It happens to everyone at some point in time. In fact, they hit me not long ago.

A fellow Coach and I were co-facilitating a train-the-coach program. On Day 3 of the training, as I watched my colleague do her thing, I marveled at her brilliance as a facilitator.

All of a sudden, out of the blue, I went into instant intimidation and felt very inadequate.

How could I possibly follow her? She was SO good. I really began to doubt my own capabilities as a trainer and facilitator.

Now…bear in mind…I didn’t have any problems with this on Day 1 and Day 2.

Fortunately, I realized I was being hit right between the eyes with the Comparison Blues. I reminded myself of my talents and the unique abilities and style I was bringing to the trainer team. With that awareness, I went on to finish Day 3 with a flourish.

The good news is you don’t have to let the Comparison Blues block you from your success, or keep you captive either.

If you find yourself in the clutches of the Comparison Blues, quickly take this Comparison Blues Antidote:

1. Be aware you’re comparing yourself to someone else (and stop it).
2. Acknowledge you are unique with your own special talents and gifts.
3. Ask yourself if there’s something about the other person you’d honestly like for yourself.
4. If so, decide what small action you can take to start getting you there and do it right away.
5. If the Comparison Blues persist, do a reality check. Talk to a supportive friend, mentor, or coach who can quickly point you back to reality.

When you get hit with the Comparison Blues…catch yourself as soon as you can…and immediately take the Comparison Blues Antidote…so you can stop singing the Comparison Blues!

Here’s to Your Success…
Jeanne